I Brushed Against a Willow
I brushed against a willow,
It brushing through my hair,
The sound of freight train whistles
Moving on the air,
The sway from the commotion
Pushing me aside
I brushed against a willow,
To find a place to hide.
I sought a place of refuge,
Hidden deep within its mane,
The sound of freight train whistles
Calling out my name,
The racket from the train tracks
Rumbling in my ears
I brushed against a willow,
And released my pent up fears.
I brushed against a willow
It cloaked me from my past,
I sat among its tendrils
Breathing deep at last,
I heard the freight train whistles
Quieting on their way
I brushed against a willow,
And started on my way.
–Ava Hypatia, February 13, 2016
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Prompt: @ D’Verse Poets, Victoria asks us to write in 1st person.
Ava Hypatia
Verbal Strings 
Beautiful flow to this with a wonderful metaphoric take on the willow. It gave me a feeling of serenity.
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I love the rhythm in this.. It’s like a song with those small changes in the refrain… I also like to read it on a metaphoric level.
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Your poem does give that serene feeling, as Victoria mentioned. I like how the title’s verse sways through the poem.
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I love this totally! The flow the rhymes, everything!
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Especially love the refrain… such a hypnotic effect 🙂
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This is lovely and, I suspect it could be a song.
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As a lover of all trees, especially willows, I absolutely adore this.
Especially:
“I brushed against a willow
It cloaked me from my past”
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A beautiful line for repetition. I like the setting of the poem…as if the narrator is walking on a field path alongside the railway tracks.
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I love the use of repetition as it brings us back to the centre premise of your poem….such beautiful images you create…
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Ah.. groWing up by railroad
tracks.. Train trestle
bridge almost
stone’s throw
away.. shakes foundation
then of shot-gun river home..
i wished for a push button
machine now answeRinG
aLL my questions.. but All
i received then iS
A sad
refRain
past iN
whistle calls
of trains old..
all anew kNow!
the birth oFliGht!
iN human Wisdom
feeLinG more.. a hive
oF push button knoWinG
and feeLinG arises whistles
Now! Google train alWays
moving ahead..
ALL ABOARD!
MORE FEELING
WISDOM NOW!
TRAIN
OF
BEING
NOW..!..:)
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